For those of you that are not aware of it, I am now informing you of our impending relocation. We’ve found a lovely old large-as-we-
need-and-desire home to while away some days in.
As I previously mentioned, this house is old and required some remodeling (the people who owned the place before had somewhat atrocious taste in the whole color scheme department and we are rectifying this foot by tedious foot), which we have been doing for the past couple of weeks. Ourselves. Perhaps you know the pain and suffering that this entails. Right about now we are down to bare bones and are hustling like hell to complete all required tasks before the 30th. That is our scheduled move date.
I am sufficiently nutso right now. Stay outta my way.
In case you are in a quandary as to what to send as a housewarming gift, I have taken the liberty of perusing red envelope’s latest offerings and have compiled a list to make it much easier for you. Viola! Quandary diminished.
The wish list is as follows:
dean & deluca spice rack The spice rack of my DREAMS!! I swear I saw it in a vision one time…
bee bath oils + honey bowl Just the nifitiest little bath thingy I have seen in a long time…and honey baths are SUPREME.
sultan’s hanging lantern For the den.
scented seaglass For the master bath, which is done in horrid aqua tile. I, being the master decorator that I am, am gonna go retro with this one rather than rip it all out and start fresh. Chrome everywhere, for everyone! Screw you, IKEA!
riedel tasting glasses Quite beautiful and useful for my daddy’s plum wine.
climbing tendril Solves the ugly wine rack and not-too-much counter space dilemmas all in one.
calla lily bouquet My favorite flower, by far. Lovely on the sitting room mantel.
leonida roses Don’t usually care too much for roses, but these are gorgeous and I can’t help myself.
crate of mini seckel pears Mmmmm, nummy!
moon lantern Perfect for my office/workshop.
silver leaf photo album Lotsa kids, lotsa pictures. Love this album.
phalaenopsis orchid Sparse and not too needy, like a good plant should be.
shot glass chess set For entertaining all those drunken Russians that we are constantly having over. Makes for a creative nookie session as well.Shop away, my lovelies. My gratitude will be expressed with a gathering in my new abode as soon as the last of the wall art is hung. Beer and sausages will be provided, but you have to bring along your own piece of ass for post-festivity fun.
If you are low on dough or simply a cheap fuck, fetch me something from ABC. I can work with just about anything. Just call me MacGuyver Stewart. All the skills of Martha, but less haughty/off-putting, way cooler and on steroids.
Don´t be shy. Lay it on me.