A Random Image

Jett Superior laid this on you on || July 1, 2001 || 12:21 am

It’s hot, d00d. So hot. And it’s only an hour or so into July. In August we shall be truly fucked. I’ll be naked. As it stands now I am only wearing bra and baggy boxer shorts. By August, I will be nekky and wanting to shed my skin. You ever been that hot??

Okay, it’s not so much the heat (per se) as it is the humidity. The humidity is the corker. “HI, RESCUE ME, I AM DROWNING.”

I saw this woman tonight at the show and it cracked me the fuck up. She had this perfectly coiffed ‘do of an 80’s big-hair metal/Guidette nature…NO LIE, gelled-up wings on the sides and all. *I am profanely proud to let you know here and now that I had no such foolish hairstyle back then; ’twas NOT hip to be square in my book, and that hairdo was definitely the squarest thing to come down the Big 80’s pike, if ya ask me.* Hilariously enough, she had on not one, not two, but three, count ‘em, three full faces of make-up. On one face. Hers.

I watched bemused as the afternoon wore into evening and her face became more and more one big creamy, smeary, disgusting and constantly-shifting glob.

I opted for smart. I wore jeans (outdoor show=mosquitos, y’all), sleeveless tee (serving the double purpose of heat relief and tan acquirer), pigtails (no icky hair-stuck-to-neck feeling), a random pair of well-loved and -worn Docs (standard issue for the Legions Of Snark) and my Magic Blue Glasses (UV protection with the unequivocal bonus of everything being awash in a soothing baby blue tint). The only cosmetics I sported were a touch of mascara with matching eyeliner and some shiny taupe lipstick.

Perhaps you all remember what a whore I am for a good lipstick.

I did not melt one bit and I was exceedingly glad, because that poor woman looked hella hideous. I still feel sorry for her, six hours later. And I hope she washed all that shit off before she went to bed. GAH-ross.

Nobody worked it out »

Don´t be shy. Lay it on me.

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