A Random Image

Jett Superior laid this on you on || April 19, 2002 || 3:33 pm

Okay, so…..a few weeks ago I received a message in my inbox that shouted, “REBATES FOR ACUVUE CONTACT LENS WEARERS!” or something along those lines. Being the innate bargain slut sleuth that I am, I read the e-mail in its entirity. It promised coupons: $50 off 4 or more boxes of Acuvue lenses, $25 off an eye exam and $25 off 4 or more boxes of Acuvue lenses. Having read all existing small print and satisfied that this was on the up and up, I followed the accompanying link to an innocuous form. (Only, my link to said form nowhere included the word ’settlement’, just so you know. It also made no mention of a ‘claims administrator’.)

I filled out the little form, after reading all applicable info and small print, and awaited the arrival of my coupons.

Today I pulled an envelope from my mailbox that bore the following return address:

In Re: Disposable Contact Lens Antitrust Litigation
Settlement Administrator
P.O. Box 9266
Garden City, NY 11530-9266

Hmm. That’s what I thought, “Hmm.” I opened the envelope to find, of course, the coupons that I had signed up for. Curiousity piqued, I turned on the ole bug-zapper-cum-internet-surfer-thingy and googled the phrase ‘disposable contact lens settlement‘. Clicking a couple links brought me to this page, which in essence tells me that by signing up for coupons I have negated any claim that I may have heretofore had in said class action lawsuit.

Not that I was gonna hop on any ole lawsuit bandwagon anyway, but WHAT THE FUCK??? I didn’t even KNOW there was a lawsuit in the works, and the original e-mail I received mentioned nothing of it or anything remotely resembling a settlement.

In short, I was duped into accepting a settlement. It’s crazy, I know, but I feel fucking violated somehow.

Any company that would resort to such practices to save themselves some spare change on a lawsuit sorta feels and smells guilty, doesn’t it? Now they’ve got my dander up -kind of- and I hope they fucking lose. And I hope that if any of you uses or has used this product will hit that site and sign up for your own rebate, as well as directing your friends, relatives and neighborhood dogs over that-a ways.

The bastards.

1 worked it out »

  1. telutci 4.19.2002

    That is vile. Fucking lawyers.


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