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Jett Superior laid this on you on || December 2, 2002 || 7:52 pm

My company gives all us employees a gift certificate from a grocery store every year. It comes with a happy, goofy generic message attached, something along the lines of “Use this toward your Thanksgiving feast!” Yes. I know.

This year we ate at my (supercalifragilisticexpialidocious) mom-in-law’s. She never lets us do anything, even though I am quite the little baker and Maxim is not far removed from being a culinary master. This year I dug in.

“I refuse to come unless I can bring something this year.”

“Well,” she responded, “you do bring something. You bring the Pepsi!”

“Roxie!” I said, exasperated, “I’m the only one who drinks the Pepsi!” She was backed into a corner and had to acquiesce. I was in charge of the mashed taters and an apple cake. Maxim brought along a couple bottles of his homemade wine. In short, the gift certificate went unused until tonight.

I went to the store a little while ago and bought clothes detergent, four boxes of Hostess mini-muffins for the kids’ after-school snacks (they were on sale for ninety-nine cents a box, rock on!), three packs of smokes and a rack of Stewart’s peach soda (in real glass bottles, oh yeah…). Don’t think that if they had gas pumps out in front of Piggly Wiggly I wouldn’ta filled up my tank with that sumbitch, as well….

5 worked it out »

  1. jen 12.2.2002

    piggly wiggly! damn, i miss those stores!

    anyone who would name a store PIGGLYFUCKINGWIGGLY is a god in my book.

    amen.

     
  2. April Love 12.3.2002

    You rock my very own little suburbia! Yay!

     
  3. The Llama 12.3.2002

    The question is this:

    Would you have detached said gas pump from your vehicle before driving away? =)

     
  4. statia 12.4.2002

    Aww hell yeah, I’da used it for everyday groceries. Detergent is expensive!!!

     
  5. Johnny T 12.4.2002

    Piggly Wiggly!!! What the . . . .

    Is that an ice cream parlor?

     

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