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Jett Superior laid this on you on || June 12, 2005 || 12:43 pm

Okay, um, shhhhh (and holy, holy SHIT!).

My eyes are darting about all cagey as I type this, but I’ve got to find a way to get to the store furtively. GOT TO.

…so I can purchase a pregnancy test.

All the tell-tale signs are there: I have extremely hurty boobs, things ‘feel different’, you know, down there, I can smell stuff like the carpet (petrochemicals, whee!) and the oil on my husband’s scalp. Plus, for three days I’ve thought obsessively ‘I’MPREGNANTI’MPREGNANTI’M SO, SO VERY PREGNANT, OOH!’ All of the previously mentioned things are consistent with each and every pregnancy thus far.

Last night, when I was comtemplating whether or not to discuss all this with Maxim, we got a call from my mom-in-law asking if we could babysit a two-month-old eedle girdle. We’ve not had a baby in this house since Mathias was a wee one.

Ha ha Cosmos, very fucking funny.

12 worked it out »

  1. skillzy 6.12.2005

    That’ll learn you not to do anything fun, Missy.

  2. Jettomatika 6.12.2005

    I know, right?

    Now I have a whole bunch of drugs that are just going to go to waste. TO WASTE.

    Oh, the humanity.

  3. Jennifer 6.12.2005

    See, that’s what you get for going off and having sex! :)

    Congrats, perhaps! :)

  4. sensible 6.12.2005


  5. Angie 6.12.2005

    my breath is bated as we wait

    oh, and about those wasted drugs….

  6. Jettomatika 6.12.2005

    Dear ‘Sensible’,

    You are welcome to your opinion, but you are NOT welcome to your cowardice…not here in these parts, anyway. If your comments are so fucking important that you have to chime in, then they must be so important as to pony up e-mail/site/etc.



    I had a tubal ligation after Mathias, becuase I AM A FAIRLY RESPONSIBLE OLE GAL. If I am indeed pregnant, then it’s divine intervention, a miracle, a joyous occasion and so on and so forth. ALL my children were…oh hell, never mind. I’ll be addressing this in a post.

    Some people are the purest definition of shithead.

  7. john 6.12.2005

    “Some people are the purest definition of shithead.”

    Not that I would ever want to get on your bad side, but it does generate some good lines.

    Though, I have to admit that just the day before I found out my brother’s wife is pregnant. A mild coinkydink it seemed.

  8. CNL 6.13.2005

    I believe the saying goes, “New house. New baby.”

    See? Has nothing to do with sex – it’s all about the house and old wive’s tales. Um, sort of.

  9. Howard 6.13.2005

    Things to do if Jett is preggers:

    1. Hire lawn boy.

    2. Forbide Maxim from cutting grass again. EVER.

    3. See number 2.

  10. not very sensible 6.13.2005

    check your email then, beeeyotch!


  11. cal 6.14.2005

    we all know the cosmos likes to screw with our heads, don’t we… but really… congrats… you be a good momma. ;-)

  12. Nina 6.23.2005

    sheesh, i leave for a few weeks and see what i miss? so don’t leave me hanging! is it a mackerel or what? (now you know why i had the works removed a year after having a tubal as i am so fertile i can think about sex and get knocked up. 3 is enough for me at the time)


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