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Jett Superior laid this on you on || June 1, 2006 || 5:29 am

My high school buddies know me best.

Forwarded to me from Pounders, who was in the mighty, mighty AP English class that had Mrs. Reid at the helm:

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

Do you suffer from shyness?

Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Tequila.

Tequila is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Tequila can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you’re ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Tequila almost immediately , and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Tequila.

Tequila may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Tequila. However, women who wouldn’t mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it. Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

The only part they left out is where you challenge a significant portion of the Fifth Fleet (and perhaps even some of the 4th Marine Division) to an arm wrestling showdown. Or to toggle shots head-to-head. Or arm wrestle WHILE throwing back shots.

You get the idear.

8 worked it out »

  1. don 6.1.2006

    That was good … so I passed it along to some who should appreciate it!

     
  2. CNL 6.1.2006

    WHICH Reminds me… Last night, whilst I layeth upon my bed, upon my sheets because it was bitchin’ hot last night and the a.c. doesn’t reach my bedroom anymore, I stumbled across a tv show on how various forms of liquor were made – tequila being one of the forms. Fascinating doesn’t even begin to describe what I learned – the most important thing being the RECIPE to THE PERFECT MARGARITA. Except I sorta dozed off and now I’m not sure how many parts of the three ingredients, though I am sure it has to be mostly 100% Agave Tequila. I will be experimenting nightly and getting back to you on that.

    BTW – I don’t drink Sambuca anymore due to it creating some of the same symptoms you described…. heh.

     
  3. skillzy 6.2.2006

    Perfect Margarita:

    One part sugar dissolved in one part water on the stove to make a simple syrup

    One part Grand Marnier

    One part lime juice

    One part Jose

    Mix all ingredients together and blend with ice.

    Drink.

    Fall over.

     
  4. Jettomatika 6.3.2006

    CNL sed:

    “I will be experimenting nightly and getting back to you on that.”

    Skillzy sed:

    “Mix all ingredients together and blend with ice.

    “Drink.

    “Fall over.”

    Jett sed:

    Hot damn, I’ve got the funniest damn readers in all of Cyberia.

     
  5. CNL 6.5.2006

    Skillzy… There wasn’t any sugar involved in this recipe, and no GM. Uses lime juice (fresh squeezed and strained), something called “Citronage” – which I can’t find anywhere, which is like GM, ‘cept different and imported from Mexico AND I might add, I meant to say “100% Blue Agave” tequila, which I did find and dang that’s expensive.

     
  6. CNL 6.5.2006

    PS:

    MIZ JETT, when I finally get all the needed ingredients, I will drink to you.

    *raise a glass to miz jett*

    *drink*

    *fall down*

     
  7. skillzy 6.5.2006

    Hey, CNL, I didn’t say it was YOUR recipe for the perfect margarita, I said it was THE recipe for the perfect margarita. All other magrittas must bow down and kiss it’s salty ring.

     
  8. CNL 6.5.2006

    Kiss your WHAT???

     

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