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Jett Superior laid this on you on || April 13, 2008 || 12:16 am

Adequate Girl rides again; where oh where is Elucidator Man?

My right hand is tight, stiff. The underside of my knuckles are bruised and battered and swollen. I was here to type out the story of why, but I lost steam midway through and my gumption has taken a backseat to my fatigue this weekend.

It is a good story: Within its environs two people, quite to my surprise, pronounced me a superhero. They were two people who were nothing at all alike and who also love and (more importantly) like me very much. I return those sentiments to them in spades.

I have been having adventures and they haven’t been making it here, sorry. I’m going to try and correct that real soon.

Right now, though, my hand hurts. And so do my legs, come to think of it.

Tomorrow afternoon I embark upon the wily task of hostessing a bridal shower. I never knew the damn things could grow so expensive so quickly, but it’s my own fault for liking to put on the dog when I’m in charge of a partayyyy. I’m making a margarita punch, because how else will I (and a couple of my favorite others) deal with all that fucking estrogen crowded into one place? Please find the recipe attached below.

In other news, we are just under one month away from the personal holiday that I like to refer to as My Tractorversary. I let Chris Robinson call it Cankleversary, because that tickles him, but don’t any of the rest of you try it or I will hit you with a tire iron or something equally redneck-y and violent. Chris has put in the TIME, yo, and that is his own little reward. Cankle, cankle-cankle, CANKLE.

HERE IS THE PUNCH RECIPE, AS PROMISED, EVEN THOUGH IT HURTS MY HAND TO DELIVER IT TO YOU. I DON’T MIND THE SACRIFICE, THOUGH, BECAUSE I AM A GIVER, DAMNIT, AND YOUR AMUSEMENT MEANS SO MUCH MORE THAN MY OWN PERSONAL COMFY WELL-BEING:

Six cups water

One twelve-ounce can of frozen cranberry juice cocktail

One-half cup fresh lime juice

One-fourth cup sugar

Two cups ice cubes

Two cups tequila (the original recipe calls for one cup, but really, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?)

Two limes, sliced

Mix that shit up, kid. Everything but the limes, that is. Stir until sugar dissolves. When the sugar gives over to the way of the gun (that would be ‘you’ and ‘your awesome stirring technique’), float some lime slices in the bowl. Garnish your punch cups with a lime slice. I personally like to go all kamikaze and rim the punchbowl with pretty margarita salt, but you may not be as a) dedicated or b) fancypants as me. It’s alright, not many can be.

1 worked it out »

  1. chris robinson 4.14.2008

    I love being the exception! What really tickles me is that you are still with us, you are healed, and that we can take a moment on this anniversary of your accident to appreciate life and health — your life and health especially.

     

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